The process of writing down my thoughts seems strange on a very esoteric level. (Don't worry, I don't know what that means either...it just sounds good.) In my general, everyday life, I have random thoughts (or strings of thought) that are triggered by some sight, sound, other thought, etc. When it runs its course, that is the end of it. It is forgotten.
Taking the time to capture those thoughts in writing is what I consider the hallmark of a great thinker. If you can't organize and relay those random ideas, it is just internal background noise.
But when effort is put into it, even if it is one short sentence, then it can be looked at, expanded (even if over a loooong period of time) and become the bais of something greater. How many times have I heard about someone who wants to write a book but never even starts?
Ursula K. LeGuin (one of my favorite authors as a youth) wrote about this when explaining her response to the question: "How do I become a better writer?" She gives a two-step process: First, learn to type. Second (and I'm paraphrasing here) put something, anything, down on paper. The best way to learn is to do. She also mentions that her response tends to irritate people.
LeGuin has a point, though - one that made a lot of sense to me (and still does). I spent a
lot of time in late high school and early college writing whatever came into my head - dreams, observations of classmates, snippets of fiction, random thoughts. I remember even writing about not having anything to write about. I just kept my pencil moving.
In college, my English 201 professor was, by far, the best writing instructor I ever had. I actually enjoyed his class. However, when it came to the final paper, I was at a complete loss. No matter how much I struggled with it (in hindsight, I probably could have spent more time in the struggle), I couldn't get started. So I dithered and delayed until the second-to-last day. (I'm sure none of you have been in that situation.)
In desperation, I just started writing. It was supposed to have been a research paper, but it ended up being some complete farce of fiction where a private-eye detective was looking for a topic. I wish I still had a copy. I was so embarassed that I was turning such tripe in that I came in on the last day, threw my paper on the pile, and left as quickly as possible. (There was no official "final" test - the paper was it.)
To this day, I have no idea what that man thought about my paper. But, by all I hold honorable and true, my final grade in that class was an A. It was the only A I received that semester. I dropped out of college (again) a semester or two later, and I never saw that professor again.
Nowadays, I have gone back to just letting the random thoughts come and go. I feel bad about it, honestly. Especially when I'm reading some of these classic books, I feel I should be recording my thoughts so I can review and expand on them (such as my thoughts about the senator from
Uncle Tom's Cabin and how that relates to other areas of politics). The easy thing to do would be to mark it down to personal laziness, but I can't believe that is the whole issue. (Of course, I could just be fooling myself. Maybe it
is due completely to being lazy.)
Sure, every now and then I break out with a blog post that goes a bit deeper than surface thoughts and actions. But, admittedly, they are few and far between. I'm not sure I'm at the point where I want to commit to writing every day. Let's face it, writing a stream-0f-consciousness blog post (like this one) is easy. Wrting something with a set purpose is harder. Writing something with any redeemable value is harder still.
Maybe what I need to do is write a stream-of-consciousness book. Yeah...(heavy on the sarcasm) I'm sure publishers would
love something like that. I do have some ideas I would like to explore, but this time in my life might not be the right time.
To everything there is a season...
